10 Totally Unselfish Self-Care Ideas
Take care of yourself so you can take care of others
If you’re like me and have an overdeveloped sense of responsibility and concern for others, you often intend to do things the bring you joy or refresh and relax you, but you put it off because:
- You feel guilty prioritizing yourself, and/or
- You feel like there’s something else you “should” be doing.
In my experience, the more I neglect taking care of myself, the more resentful I become of other people. I resent my commitments. I resent my work. I resent the very people I care about most and whom I intend to help or serve. I feel bound and constrained by the unspoken demands or requests that I assume they’re asking of me.
Eventually, all those assumed expectations, all those demands on me (real or imagined), all the pressure I put on myself to constantly be productive wears me down. Then the very drive that kept me from caring for myself in the first place — the intent to serve others and put their needs before my own — gets undermined, because I am so tired and resentful that I end up wallowing on my couch instead of actually helping people.
“You can’t pour from an empty cup” but
“A full cup runneth over.”
Take some time to fill your own cup so that you can give generously to others with grace and compassion — rather than resentment, guilt, and score-keeping.
July 24 is International Self-Care Day
While self-care is sometimes portrayed as fluff and leisure for the privileged, the World Health Organization emphasizes its importance in managing stress and engaging in preventive care. Self-care can play a role in combatting, preventing, identifying, or mitigating many chronic and lifestyle diseases, as well as mental health conditions.
There is no substitute. Self-care is not something you can delegate, squeeze in, pop a pill for, or catch up on later. It is most effective when it is a regular part of one’s lifestyle.
While that might sound daunting or difficult — especially for those who are time- or resource-constrained — there are lots of easy and inexpensive ways to incorporate self-care in your life. To get you started, below I’ve listed 10 simple, free or low-cost ways you can take care of yourself and others.
For more inspiration, check out these other ideas for self-care activities:
Be well and enjoy!
Diligence with Dividends
Sometimes self-care doesn’t necessarily feel good in the moment, but yields rewards that are good for our physical, mental, emotional, social, or spiritual health. So invest a little time into something that will serve your wellbeing.
- Do that thing you’ve been procrastinating on.
Pick one small thing that’s been hanging over your head — something that you know won’t actually take that long, but you’ve been putting it off. Think of how good it will feel to be out from under that nagging feeling that there’s something you should be doing! Then buckle down for a few minutes to get it done and enjoy the reprieve! - Move your body.
Sitting is the new smoking. When the couch is calling, commit to just 10 minutes of movement — whether it’s a walk around the block, taking the stairs in your apartment building, a dance party in your living room, or stretching on the living room floor. After 10 minutes, if you feel like doing more, go for it! But if you feel like returning to the couch, at least you did that one thing. Eventually, work up to at least 30 minutes every day. - Stop scrolling.
Do something (anything!) that does not involve a screen. Connect with a real human. Go for a walk. Meditate. Colour in a colouring book. Play with your pet. Notice how you feel after five to ten minutes. If it feels good, figure out how you can make this a more frequent occurrence in your life and think about how you can set yourself up to make it easy to incorporate screen-free time more regularly. - Sleep soundly.
Sleep hygiene can be tough, especially when the dopamine hits keep us endlessly scrolling on social media or binge-watching on Netflix. If you’re prone to staying up too late and feeling groggy and sluggish in the morning, identify just one small change you can realistically make and put in place at least one accountability mechanism that will support you to stick with it. For some people that’s a notification on their phone that it’s time to turn off screens and wind down. Others might find an app that locks their computer, phone, or specific apps or web pages (like Netflix) after a certain time. - Preventive care.
Do a breast self-exam, testicular self-exam, skin cancer self-exam, and/or oral cancer self-exam. Book yourself a cleaning at the dentist’s, or a pap smear / mammogram / prostate exam / blood test, or an intake with a therapist. Take care of your well-being.
Did you know the five-year survival rates from prostate cancer are 98% if it’s caught early (while it’s still localized) but only 30% if it’s caught later (once it has spread to other organs and parts of the body)? Stats like that are why screenings are so important.
Pay It Forward
Doing something nice for someone else makes us feel good. Michael Norton’s TED Talk shares that spending the money on someone else brings more happiness than spending the same amount on ourselves. Here are a few ways you can feel good by doing something nice for someone else.
Whatever you choose to do, bring a mindset of gratitude and generosity — how glad you are that you are in a position to be able to help others in this way. Choose a person / organization and activity that you feel good about; this is not about resentment, obligation, or adding another “must do” to your list.
- Volunteer your time.
Whether it’s at the local food bank or soup kitchen, picking up litter or removing invasive species with an environmental group, or any other cause you care about, doing something to help others leaves a satisfying feeling of accomplishment. - Phone a friend or family member.
Take time to connect with someone whose company you enjoy or who will be touched by the gesture. Especially for elderly relatives or those living alone, a visit, phone call, or letter might brighten their day. - Help a friend, family member, or neighbour.
Maybe someone needs help moving house, gardening, or mowing their lawn. Or if they recently had a baby or suffered a loss or are going through a tough time, bringing them food or helping with household chores like laundry might be welcome. - Engage in random acts of kindness.
Offer kindness with no expectation of anything in return. Hold the door open for someone, carry their bag(s) for them, buy a coffee or transit ticket for the person behind you in line, or simply smile or offer a compliment. You never know when that might make someone’s day! - Express your gratitude.
Write a thank you note to someone for a specific act or just to tell them how much you appreciate having them in your life. It could be a card or letter, an email, a text or video message, or any other format or medium you choose. Reflecting on and sharing how much you appreciate that person will make you both feel warm and fuzzy!
These are just a few ideas to spark your imagination and get the creative juices flowing, so you can think of ideas that suit you and your life.
Here are more ways to integrate self-care into your life, including some pampering and some to share with a friend, family member, lover, or pet:
There are many more ways in which you could practice self-care and that’s really the point: You do you.
Do whatever nurtures your health and all aspects of your well-being — physically, mentally, emotionally, socially, spiritually. Build in movement and rest. Include things that feel good now and are just plain fun, as well as the not-fun things that are important and good for you.
Bottom line: Self-care is literally about taking care of yourself. When you are well, you can give gladly from the excess!
